Hurt

I just broke up with the person who works so hard to make me happy.

I'm sorry. I just couldn't do it anymore.
It hurt too much to not be able to love you as much as you loved me.

Incidentally Falling

I don't know if you just made my life harder or easier.

Do you really think I'm just going to jump your bones anytime I want to hang out with you?

No. I am going to jump yours because for a super nerd, you're pretty hot with a great rack and I am sure I could do things to you that would make your head spin.

When I start thinking about the whole thing my heart starts to pound and my breath becomes shallow. I feel those little flutters start in my stomach.

There is no way I'm falling in love.

I don't know this guy.

He's just someone I work with.

This is just emotions running away with me.

I'm after that rush of being with someone new.

I can't go diving straight into a relationship after leaving one.

This isn't happening.

I definitely can't date someone I work with.

I'm just fantasizing he has a real interest in me.

I'm just a girl jumping to conclusions...

"It is very often nothing but our own vanity that deceives us. Women fancy admiration means more than it does."

- Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice

I'm just putting emotions in the situation that both don't belong and are probably just a consequence of my imagination.

Grr...

Men are annoying.

That is all.

Seriously?

Does every guy want to see me naked?


I'm a little shocked at the guys coming out of the woodwork suggesting I do nude photos. Old friends from college, guys I work with.
The balls on some of these guys astonishes me.


Holy Crap. I don't know what just happened.

Bastard.

It's my fault. I let it go on for too long.
It was fun for a little while.
Now I'm just mad.

I thought he might actually want to come hang out with me. As a friend, no strings attached. I could be good. He could've just said no. I would've left him alone. I should've left him alone.

lol Could shoulda woulda

Instead it was a text conversation played out over several hours, his flirting and me trying to provoke him out of his hiding place.
With absolutely nothing, in the end.

I don't know who he thinks I am. But I'm not some teenage sex fiend that can't control myself.
Yes I kissed him.
Yes I like him.
But I don't need that.
I need a friend.


Bastard.